When things happen unexpectedly..

When things happens unexpectedly, it's just like the unexpected guest knocking on your door..
 They never fail to catch us of guard and we soon find ourselves in a turmoil of feelings.. some managed to put it aside and view it from different perspectives… some.. unfortunately, found themselves helplessly drown in one hundred and one whirlpool of emotions… 
As for me.. it depends- if the situation pulls me into a deep deep grievances.. .. I guess giving myself a good, good, very good cry would help me to ease .. it may take days of on and of crying… asking questions foolishly of the 'WHYs, HOWs, WHATs..'- Why me.. How can this thing happened... What did i do to deserve this...
The list of questions will go on and on.. until the reality sank it- IT's THERE- I have to face it.

Just like having a bad fall at the first time.. the hurt was so painful that you can’t help yourself but to cry, wouldn’t even dare to look at the wound – what more to think of a way to nurse the wound appropriately. Having someone close to you yet not involved in the situation would definitely a bliss.. as they are the ones who would nurse the wound as to what they think would help at that particular period of time… Still, nothing would really help but you- yourself..


Things are meant to be when they are meant to be.. That’s what makes life meaningful to live.. Our life is still a bed of roses.. STILL.. We have to remember.. roses come with thorns.. Before we can even see the rose buds.. we have to bare the view of a thorny plant.. If left untreated, the rose plant would only be a thorny plant.. couldn’t even bear a single bud for us to feast our eyes upon.. 

Just like planting a rose plant, patience is fully required.. Not only that, we seek advise from those who planted roses… those who are seen as expert or experienced.. But then.. the real deal is in our EFFORT and our PERSEVERANCE. Though at times we may prick our finger while tending the plants.. it is because of faith, we keep on putting on the stuffs. The more we tend the plant.. the more we notice small things, tiny development of the plant.. Good neighbours and friends may give us good materials- anything that would help us to have a beautiful rose plant.. but then, if we do not get up and start doing things ourselves… the fertilizers would go wasted.. the roses would be only in our dreams..

Patience, perseverance.. and faith..

At the end of the day.. having faith to your believes.. the ONE .. would always provide you a blanket of comfort.. It is your faith in God that would keep you going on.. though at time you feel that your effort is wasted, enough of patience and perseverance bared… Your faith in God.. would help you to stand and face the music.. things happen for a reason.. It is just unexplainable at that period of time.

As time would heal.. Patience, perseverance .. and faith would finally let you feast the first moment your plant bears the rose. You will soon see that things that happen unexpectedly.. happen because God knows what is best for you.. making your life meaningful as it was meant to be.

" On no soul does Allah place a burden greater than it can bear. It gets every good that it earns, and it suffers every ill that it earns. (Pray:) 'Our Lord! Condemn us not if we forget or fall into error; our Lord! Lay not on us a burden like that which You did lay on those before us; Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. You  are our Protector; help us against those who stand against Faith'" (Al-Baqarah- 286)

is the cup half full or half empty...

The expression of 'is the cup half empty or half full ' reflects the need to look at matters in different perspectives. Though it is commonly used to indicate that a particular situation could be a cause of looking at things positively or negatively as well as used as a tool to simply evaluate the individual's personality (optimist vs pessimist) - STILL labelling does not serve any significant effect on evaluating matters and facing certain facts that we dealt with in life.

Our perception on things.. matters.. events.. people.., is unique as our interpretation of the reality realies heavily on our experience. What we experienced builds up the perception and therefore we look at things as 'half-emptied cup or half-filled cup'.

Challenges in life should be attended with various perspectives. It is not the matter of your 'cup' is half empty or half full' , is the matter of taking it in and embrace it- No matter how difficult it is. We have to look at a bigger picture. Ask- WHY should you ever look at the cup? Look at the whole tea set! The cup may be filled or emptied... but still you have a tea set- your life!  You are still breathing and therefore you are given the chance to fill NOT only the tea cup BUT every cup..

SO.. when questions arise, statements argued... half full or half empty... take it as a mission, a request that YOU need to make the best out of the tea set... The tea set is there... use it wise.. use it to the fullest... it is not there for us to weep and complaint or even GLOAT.. it is half full or half empty.. CHOICE has been made. TAKE CARE OF YOUR TEA SET!

"So eat of the sustenance which ALLAH has provided for you, lawful and good; 

and be grateful for the favours of ALLAH, if it is HE Whom you serve" 

(Al-Nahl : 114) 

M.O.T.H.E.R.

To nourish children and raise them against odds is in any time, any place, 

more valuable than to fix bolts in cars or design nuclear weapons.

- Marilyn French-

I admire and will always admire individuals whom without any assistance raise their kids. They are the epitome of true survivors. They may lead their lives alone without love and care from an individual called spouse but they manned up and face the world. They push their needs aside and focus. The fruit of their undivided love for their kids- i'm sure it's beyond any value exist in the world!

A mother is a survivor whose sacrifice and care is an icon of pure undivided love - the kind of love that you will never ever have from anyone. Experiencing this kind of love varies. Some may experience it throughout their lives without ever questioning their mother's love... some may need to look beyond what meets the eye. No matter how we experience love from our mother... this individual is our mother. The person who will always have you in her heart no matter what. The person whose love transcends time.

A mother is a survivor who always put aside her needs to accomodate the need of her kids. No matter how, no matter what, deep in her heart there will always be a vow to make her children happy.. there will always be a vow to make her children's need is fulfilled.. Her way of showing her love may be vague... Her way of showing her concern may differ from what we have in our mind.. but- look... observe.. we would surely find her love hiding behind those wrinkles.. those nagging.. those stern faces..

Hence- she is a true survivor for all she cares is everyone's need accept hers and for how well she hides the need to fulfill her needs..

Having said.... Mothers are survivors that all of us should look up to, giving our undivided love and care no matter where.. no matter what.. Happy Mother's Day. 

"Heaven liveth at the feet of mothers"

- Prophet Muhammad -

of.. grievances

"Human mind is highly intelligent. Yet its very intelligence is tainted by madness. Madness as such that this dysfunction of the human mind has the destructive impact." (Eckhart Tolle)


Feelings.... especially resentment.. are often magnified by our innerselves. When things didn't go our 'way'... we start to complain.. blaming.. Still.. given time.. we can see that the 'fault' that we perceive in others actually isn't even there. It is a total misinterpretation of the reality at hand- a projection by the mind conditioned to see the 'enemy', to pacify our inner cry to put us in the right light.. to be more superior. In other words, these are the cry of.. "i'm right, you are wrong" or "after all that i've done, this is what i get".


So what then..
Do we really need to put aside these feelings? How do we 'delete' such feelings that begin to creep slowly into our hearts? First- YES. We need to put aside. By putting aside these feelings of resentment, we allow ourselves to improve spritually. We need that. Nothing is gained if we keep on nurturing such feelings. Move on. Yes- the key is to love thyself. Grievances is just an event that happened in the past and- therefore should be kept in the past. By nurturing the grievances, feelings of resentment we are keeping the past alive. This will contaminate other areas in our lives. With that.. we put ourselves vulnerable for self destruction.

How do we 'delete' these feelings.. FORGIVE.. we can only let go grievances when forgiveness happens. To let go, to forgive is when we see that it has no purpose other than to strengthen a false sense of self.  Be honest to thyself. The past has no power to stop us in being in the PRESENT. So stop harbouring grievances- let go. Let go and live in the reality with better perspectives. Things happens for a reason.. it is with a clear mind we can look the real present- the now.. not the present that we have misinterpreted while harbouring the feelings of grievances..


"Kind words and the covering of faults are better than charity followed by injury. Allah is free of all wants, and HE is Most-Forebearing" (Al-Baqarah: 263)

happiness as i see it....

Happiness does not lie upon whom you r with or what do you have..
It lies upon how positive you r about yr life and how comfortable you r about being you.. 

Some of us think that when we are not with someone or.. we do not have certain things… then our life is miserable…

Especially when we lost someone… the world seemed very cruel… biting you in every way that you could not stand up and hold your head up.

 

The very thing is… your world.. your life is still a bed of roses… Though is hard to look at it that way, you just have to shake it off. The world is not cruel to you. The fact is- when you feel depressed and when you, yourself label your world as being cruel to you, you are actually being cruel to yourself.

By labeling your world as cruel, you are not giving yourself a chance to appreciate life. God has given you a life.. a life that is truly short for you to weep about things that you have lost. Observe… look what you have… not at what you lost..God is great.. You may think that you have lost something valueable in your life- the lost is so significant for you that you have to grieve upon it and therefore label your life as miserable. 

Chin up.. Look again.. God never take anything from you! Things you may think are taken away from you are actually taken for good. 

God created you- God is the only ONE who knows whats best for you. 
Things taken away are meant to be taken away…

So.. put on yr best positive glassess n view yr world… Be grateful.. God has given abundance of everything good…Never allow discontenment blinded you with the sustenance- which are abundance given to you. WE SHOULD TURN TO ALLAH INSTEAD OF RUNNING AFTER FALSE FANCIES.. 

 

“…O men! Call to mind the grace of Allah unto you! Is there a creator, other than Allah- to give you sustenance from heaven or earth? There is no god but HE: how then you are deluded away from the Truth..” (Al Faathir:3)